HISTORY’S BIGGEST DRUG DEAL

Hey you with the greasy red skin
and paint all over your face
I got something for you

D’you mean me?
You with the skin of a toad
bleached with the urine of a bitch in heat

Just trying to be helpful
I thought you might like to trade a few pelts
for a bottle of this magic elixir
I’ll let you in on a little secret:
It’s why we’re superior to you

Really? I have no need for paleface potions
and I have no pelts to trade

But you owe it to your children
to try this invigorating tonic
a special blend brewed just for you
We call it firewater

But I have something far finer already
a spiritual herb
with medicinal qualities
I’m sure your children will love it
We call it tobacco

Let’s make a deal!

GLUG PUFF GLUG PUFF GLUG PUFF

Cough… Hic… Cough… Hic… Cough… Hic

 

 

RECENT ACCUMULATIONS AND APPROPRIATED VOICES, Kalayaan Publications, 1997

  

Content of this website is released with ‘copyleft’ license, that is you are free to copy, redistribute or use it for your own purposes provided you retain the present copyleft notice including my name and contact information, allowing others to subsequently reuse the material.  Robin Sharpe, crankyman98@gmail.com.